Lots of comments in the "Slaves" post has prompted a Part II. We're going to talk specifically about higher education and is it really necessary in the whole scheme of things. And once again we're going to debunk some famous Duggar myths.
Now because this is my blog HA! I reference my life. It's been brought to my attention that not everyone has lived their life like me. No kidding. In fact, I should hope not. Who on earth would want to be divorced twice before they hit 30, have no marketable skills, live off their trust fund, find their true religious faith at 30, and just drift until 36 when they marry "the one?" So now that we've passed that "duh" moment, I'll get on with the blog....
If you read comments on other blogs by people who clearly aren't Duggar fans, you clearly get the impression that the non-Duggar group feels the girls are literally trapped inside that home, held hostage, they have no access to money, couldn't go to any type of college/higher education course if they wanted to, and are just working for their parents inside the home until they are married off to proper husbands. Some readers here may feel that way too, although so far I think we have mostly fans, but who am I to say. I'll go on the record to say that I don't feel that way.
As for being held hostage? Well as was also pointed out in a comment, there is cousing Amy, Michelle's large family, and any number of fans out there who'd be willing to offer shelter and help to any one of the girls should they desire to "escape" the Dugger stronghold. Don't think for a minute these girls have no outside family or friends to turn to if they don't want to live at home anymore. And don't think for a minute that Jim Bob is keenly aware of that.
I will say that in my world growing up, I was forced to go to college. The only choice I had was where I could go. People think that's funny, I did mention it on another Duggar blog and the same people who say the Duggar girls aren't allowed to leave--they have no money and can't go--said I could leave and how could I say I was forced to go to college--no I didn't have any money, my parents held the purse strings. They failed to see the irony in their statements. If one thing could be true for the Duggar girls NOT being allowed to go to college, why couldn't it be true for me being FORCED to go to college? So yes, I had no say in the matter--in my family you went to college, the end.
I went to a very well-respected, highly prized "west coast ivy league" school in Portland, Oregon and got a Bachelor of Science in English. I chose the major because I could complete it in 4 years, not because I could do anything specific with it. My mom kept saying all that mattered was that I had a degree--that's all employers look at--little did she know the world would be changing. But let's move on. I do have some background with research skills, writing papers, and drinking tequila in excess. But I have the piece of paper.
In the 18 years since I have graduated I have had 3 jobs and the longest of those last 3 years. None of them required a college degree. The degree GOT me one of them because the owner was an alumni, but that was it. I still made $10/hour part time and the dot com bust killed us 10 months later. The most I ever made was $13.73/hr dispatching for the cable company and to be honest, the degree almost hurt me there, because being one of the only ones with a degree in a place where no one else has one, they tend to look at you like "what do you think you're better than me?"
So I'm not saying that college degrees are useless. I'm saying mine hasn't been worth the $80k my parents put into it. I'm saying that without a clear career goal at the end of it, it's probably not a good idea to just go for the sake of going. Dave Ramsey won't tell you to just send your kids to college for the sake of sending your kids to college unless they have a clear idea of what they are going to do with the degree when they come out on the other side. The world economy has changed and degrees don't matter anymore in the workplace unless they do something specific.
Now the things the kids have all said they want to be are specific. Some of the little boys want to be firemen and policemen. JoyAnna has said once in an early interview (when she was younger--much younger) that she wanted to be a nurse. Some of the girls, who are now older, when they were pre-teens said they wanted to be things like chefs, beauticians, and midwives. Now they are in their late teens and 20s. Well guess what? When I was a pre-teen I wanted to be a Solid Gold Dancer. When I was in high school I wanted to be a nurse. When I got to college I wanted to be neither of those things. Your ideas change as you get older. Most little boys want to be cowboys and firemen when they are little--if they stayed true to those goals we'd have herds of firemen and cowboys running around. How many 7 yr olds do you know that say they want to be CPAs? Yet we seem to have enough CPAs to go around.
I'm just entertaining the idea that it's possible they don't really want to be those things anymore. Josh said he wanted to be a lawyer when he was 16. He's not 16 anymore. Things change. Notice they haven't asked them THIS SEASON what they want to be? The "what you want to be" question was posed during a 1 hour special that occured before the 30 minute show even started....they are now on season 4. It would be nice to know what the kids think about NOW instead of a lot of speculating and remembering dreams they had when they were much younger. Frankly I'd be a bit annoyed if you kept holding me to my pre-teend dream and throwing it in my face on blogs...no, I'm not going to be a Solid Gold Dancer, so maybe beautician also fell by the wayside and she's on to some new idea?
I have to agree with the comment made on the "Slaves" post...It would be really sad if the Duggars caved in to their detractors and enrolled one or more of their children in higher learning simply because people feel they should, not because it's something their child(ren) truly want or need at this particular time. Just because this family has chosen to share their lives with us on TV doesn't mean we get to dictate their lives, direct their lives, or comment so harshly on their lives that they question their own decisions.
Please, just try to entertain the idea that the Duggar girls are actually enjoying the fact that they are on a TV show right now and life is pretty good. Besides the fact that they have wonderful new baby sister at home that they've been waiting months to get to know. Just because this kind of life is foreign to you, doesn't mean they don't love living it.