Friday, June 18, 2010

WWDD Part II: WHY Would Duggars Do.....

I had an interesting email conversation with a friend the other day that had to do with the Duggars and things they don't do, but things we do. There are things a lot of us do in our daily lives that seem perfectly acceptable and normal to us that the Duggars do not do. I personally have no problem with that, but it is interesting to think about: books we read, TV we watch, movies we see--all of these have Duggar conflicts.

I've been pretty upfront about the things I do differently than the Duggars and things that I don't agree with the Duggars on, but it's always the big things--religion, politics, etc. We haven't discussed the small things--and these small things are what make the Duggars stand out from the rest of the world. They are on a TV show, but don't watch TV. A lot of people have trouble reconciling that--on it's face it does seem pretty hypocritical, but you have to ask the big question "why?" and then be wise enough to wait for an answer. The Duggars have had TV in their home twice--a year after they married and then a few years after that when he traded some things for a satellite dish. Both times they enjoyed the TV, but enjoyed it too much. Jim Bob found that it turned him into a couch potato and he wasn't spending the time with his family that he knew he should be spending. The second time, with all those additional channels, they found that they had to wade through a lot of "unacceptable" programming to get to the few things that were "acceptable." They realized that they were letting these "unacceptable" things into their home and even though they weren't watching them, they had to see them to make them go away. It just wasn't worth it. There's the answer to "why."

We don't have TV service or even the ability to get the local channels, but it's not a religious decision, it's a financial one. We do watch plenty of TV either on-line or by getting DVDs from the library, or watching the ones we already own (I'm a sit-com junkie.) Chassidic Jews don't watch TV either because they believe it takes away valuable time from Torah study and prayer--TV and movies a like are just not worth the time when there are more important things to do. My Rabbi's family does watch videos/DVDs but they are all educational and all religious based. The Duggars are the same way. They've said on numerous occassions that they have a lot of videos the kids watch--all religious based and/or educational. I'm not that picky. I do put my desires ahead of my needs in that respect. I've never questioned it. I watch what I want to watch when I want to watch it. It does have it's drawbacks. When my daughter sees a picture of Charlie Sheen in a magazine she starts singing "Men Men Men" and she will ask to watch "Big Bang"--for "Big Bang Theory" (can you imagine the Duggars watching THAT?) But for the most part she asks for her own DVDs that are kid-related and usually educational.

Along the same lines the Duggars don't watch many movies. My daughter has been watching Disney movies lately, but I try to examine them with a "Duggar" eye and I have to wonder if they are allowed to watch them. I watch "Dora" and "Clifford" with a Duggar eye as well and even though the kids know who these characters are (Michelle pointed out a Clifford patch on a dress at the thrift store once and it was a good thing) I wonder if they watch them much, since they don't have a religious theme and sometimes the message is hard to find. I remember 2 years ago when I was driving the Rabbi's girls back to school and they were reading the "Twilight" series in the van. They had gotten them from the library and were totally engrossed in them, so apparently they were allowed to read them, but I have no doubt that they have NOT seen the movies and probably never will. I just read the series myself a few weeks ago and there's NO WAY the Duggar kids would be getting any where near it. Even if the message is "saving yourself for marriage and true love exists" I sincerely doubt the Duggar parents would allow vampires and werewolves into their home willingly.

We do know the Duggars go to movies, when they are acceptable. They never mentioned what movie Josh, Anna, Jana, and John David went to during the engagement episode, just that it was an R-rated movie that you had to be 18 to see and that's why the twins went with them. Was "Fireproof" rated R? I have no desire to see it myself, but they were huge Kirk Cameron fans later on when they met him. They do have a point that there arent' a lot of movies made now adays that fall into the religiously upbeat category. I'm sure they have to hunt high and low to find movies to see. That's likely why they stick to DVDs they can order. My daughter has been to many adult movies in her pram. She seems pretty entertained just by the big screen alone, although she did get a little restless during "Quantum of Solace" and "Defiance"--but she's British and going to develop a love of Daniel Craig because I'm the mom and I said so!

Entertain yourself and go through your day, pausing to ask yourself, "Would the Duggars do this?" You may get a laugh and you may get some insight. I don't plan on changing much, but I do get a kick out of doing it.


  1. I was under the impression that the movie they went to see hadn't been released yet, and that's why they had to be 18. Fireproof is PG.

  2. I got that feeling too--i just didn't know what movie it was....thanks for the info on fireproof :) ...maybe someday they'll tell us or maybe they didn't have permission to name the movie or maybe they didn't want to admit they saw something that wasn't "religious"...i have no idea...i don't even know when (in real time) they went to the movie...

  3. Actually the Fireproof that was on the religous channel here last night was rated G. The only questionable thing in it would have been when he was arguing loudly and very closely with his wife.
    My guess is that whereever it was being shown that night was asking for adults only. There are movie theaters locally that do that for 9:00PM shows here so that adults aren't putting
    up with loud teenagers, etc.

  4. Fireproof has been highly recommended on most of the Christian blogs I've visited. I'm not sure about the rating but I do recall a "loud" verbal fight between the husband and wife in the movie. Well, "to me" Kirk was the only one who could act. I remember Michelle said Jackson asked if that was Kirk's wife he was kissing. He said he kisses "only" his wife. Of course this was something the Duggars were thrilled to know. I remember the smirky look Jana gave after he said it.

    I've seen every Disney movie that exists. Now for some reason I'm aware of the violence and paganism that exist in most of the movies. But, the good news is there are people who are NOT "emotionally scarred" by Disney movies. I'll be a Disney fan til I die!

    Hey MaryBeth, let's try to think of some movies or books that "we" think are "safe" enough for the older Duggars. Let this be a challenge for everyone! :)We already know they read Christian books but there are many great novels out there that...won't convert them.

    To Kill A Mocking Bird
    Pride and Prejudice
    Tom Sawyer
    Chicken Soup For the Soul
    Making Toast

  5. Two different movie going experiences. When they saw Fireproof it was a "sneak preview" at a Christian Movie premiers thingy.

    Date night was back in AR when Jinger was the one that got to be the chaperon, and they ended up picking a movie to go watch that was R so they needed an older sibling to go along.

    Sorry I've been gone so long Marybeth... My browser was fried for weeks, and I could only get to the other blog through the emails trying to come straight to your blog got me redirected.

  6. I think I remember Michelle saying that the main reason they do the show is not to get famous but to show people that there is another way to live. I think it is fine to do a TV show to share something with the world even though you may not watch TV. By the way I am a big fan of TV, love the Duggar's but have different, Unitarian, religious beliefs.

  7. Hey Cyn! I do remember them showing a clip of the couple arguing. It was pretty intense. Surprised they let the younger kids watch. But I'm glad they did. They got to see that marriage isn't always quiet with hugs and kisses. We did get to see a happy ending and that's great. I thought JB was sweet to take the baby out to play while the others watched the movie. :)

    There are a lot of 3D cartoons coming out. Does anyone think they will safe for the Duggar kids to watch??

  8. I think the Duggars are also fans of Facing the Giants and Flywheel (made by the same brothers who produced Fireproof). And....a few (some?) of the Duggars have a cameo appearance in the upcoming movie Courageous (also made by the same brothers of the movies mentioned above)! Can't wait!

  9. Wow, another Angie! I'm also a BIG fan of TV. What's Unitarian? You just gave me something new to google. :)I also LOVE to google.

    The Duggars were already famous before the show. It's good they helped people be aware of others who live similar to them. We've found 50 on the internet. And yes we were that curious to seek out others like the Duggars...but didn't have a show. :)

    There are many things I don't agree with, but I'm still a BIG fan.

  10. I don't believv the duggars have anything against Disney. Afterall in the special on the road with 16 they went to Disneyland willingly and staye in the Disneyland hotel(basing that on the appearance of the hotel). I actually found that refreshing. Especially since i hav met many conservative Christians who believe Disney to have been a satanist(he was a Christian though not strictly practicing). They point yo more recent movies as proof of this. I guess no one got the memo he died in 66.

    I work at wdw and I see conservative people in here all the time. Religiously conservative. Most you can tellbecause of clothing choices r it long sleeves or skirts even in the dead heat of summer. Yes skirts are still breezy then but Lon sleeves are not. So I know it's not wide spread but I lot of doomsayers try to bash Disney a lot.

    So I don't think the duggars have anything against it, but probably don't really show it yo their kids. After all, they don't watch tv very often

  11. I own Fireproof I love it. Fighting is healthy in relationships, when it clears the air, and actually fixes things. The movie showed that.

  12. They also watch The Andy Griffith Show on DVD.

  13. wasn't the husband in "fireproof" addicted to internet porn? ....i admit the only things i know about the movie i learned from a morning show discussion on a rock station--so they were more or less making fun of it--but they did go through the movie point by point and pick it apart....i have no great desire to see it myself

  14. Fireproof actually did well at the box office, despite the acting. And yes the husband was addicted to internet porn and gave his fire fighting buddies more attention than he did his wife. There were quite a few "mainstream" issues throughout the movie. I would like Sherwood Films to make a movie about a family or couple who are more orthodox. EVERYONE has their own struggles.

    Ok has anyone thought of any books or movies they can watch. This is harder than I thought.

  15. Internet porn is part of the argument in the movie, but as to 'addicted' vs just viewing... they just sort of imply it in one scene, along with being 'addicted' to consumerism. I went to the movie's website, where there were chapters to the book, and as usual, the movie seems to have left a lot out. Even though I don't read Christian fiction, and I thought the movie was simplistic/holier-than-thou, the concept of the 'Love dare' intriques me.

  16. yes mary beth he was.. the only thing they show was a popup of a girls pic (clothed) with the flashing words "want to chat??" or something along those lines. it was indicative but nothign provacative. my fiance atually got into the movie despite not having any real religious beliefs other than there being a higher power. he thought it a little too preachy but did appreciate it

  17. i do sympathize with the desire for movies that affect your personal life...we've watched ONE that is prudent to our religious beliefs and it was actually a pretty good Israeli's called "Ushpuzin" which is Hebrew for "guests" have to either know Hebrew or be willing to read subtitles, but it was the first time we watched a movie where i felt like "wow someone made a movie that i can actually relate to on a religious yet real life level" ...i have no doubt that the Duggars struggle with that too, since there don't seem to be a lot of movies made like that or if they are they are low-budget and hard to find...but on that note i wonder if entertainment for entertainment's sake is really all that bad? like i said in my sect it isn't really allowed or i should say, done...there are more important things to do than watch tv or movies, so when they do it's something of value...i get the impression that the Duggars may not feel exactly that way, but if it doesn't have a positive or uplifting message then it isn't worth the risk...they do seem to have a bit of fear there and that's something i'm not familiar daughter watches most of what we watch, and a lot of it is probably inappropriate, but i don't feel the need to hide it from her and she doesn't seem to mom tried keeping certain shows and movies away from me growing up and it only made me watch them in secret and wasn't that worse?

  18. LOL only movie my mom wouldn't let me watch growing up that I REALLY wanted to watch was "Grease" (the original) it was on TV by that time and I couldn't watch it... So I snuck my portable TV to my room and watched it, got caught, and still to this DAY can't figure out why my mom didn't want me to watch it... well other than the giving me ideas on sneaking out of the house... the rest I didn't even understand at 9...

  19. Ok as a suggestion as to media the Duggars could enjoy but might not....
    I collect girls story book from 1920s-1950s and many of them have a Christian / Religious theme. Infact we had several publishing companies that were specifically Christian. Never in these books did you find anti any other religion but they are unfortunately littered with comments that we might find racist now - or occasionally references to smoking. But apart from that they are exceedingly innocent, give wonderful education of other lands, bording schools (such a laugh) and many of the feature large families. One comes to mind where there was a family of 11 biological and 5 adopted children.
    I will be happy to pass these on to my kids when i have finished with them - ha still read them now as does my mum borrow them for light entertainment!!!!

  20. ok now if we are listing BOOKS and or series... I have several I know the Duggars will like:
    Bobbsey Twins
    Hunny Bunch
    Trixe Belden
    Little Farm in the Ozarks
    (stories about Laura Ingalls little girl)
    Nancy Drew
    The Boxcar Children

    ALL of these were written before I was born.... and the Duggars would love them for their kids.

  21. I thought the twins went on the movie date night because one of the PREVIEWS was from an R rated movie. I can't imagine the Duggars going to see an R rated movie.

  22. who would go to the trouble of calling the movie theater and inquiring as to the ratings on the previews? The previews are always approved for ALL audiences regardless of the movie rating.
    If that is truly what happened, then that is a situation where I think Mom and Dad Duggar were being overprotective of the teenage girl that was playing chaperone that night.

  23. Well, I would like to see the episode again because I seem to recall Josh saying it was an R rated preview. It's possible people could call a movie theater about previews because a couple at my church were upset about a preview when they took their kids to a movie so I can see them calling about the previews after that. Also, it just makes no sense to me that for a family that doesn't watch TV and says Nike when a woman with revealing clothes walks by AND takes a chaperone on a date would go to an R rated movie on that date.

  24. Perhaps someone knows the answer to this question. OK, we all know that there are things on TV that children shouldn't be watching and that there are parental controls, and we all know that kids should have interests outside of TV and video games...BUT would the world come to an end if the little Duggar kids watched 'Sesame Street' or 'Clifford The Big Red Dog' giving the older kids some quiet time to do their homework? Does a movie like 'Easter Parade' on PBS invoke lustful thoughts? It seems like this family goes to such lenghts to prevent sexual thoughts which seems to cause entirely too much sexual thinking. Yelling Nike when a woman walks by wearing whatever constitues immodest clothing only brings attention to that clothing. Want to bet all the boys peek guiltily? It's downright silly.

  25. actually jim bob and michelle have had tv service a few times in their marriage...they aren't anti-tv at all...they do have one and they watch some things on it and use it for's not so much what's on tv (although they don't prefer things that are provacative)'s more that there are so many OTHER things they could be doing that are more productive...they found that when they had tv they would watch more and more and do less and less...they don't want to instill that in their children....seseme street and clifford turn into the show after that and the show after that...once it's on it's hard to turn off...but yes they do watch things on tv...movies and Arkansas football and some approved shows...i worship at an Chassidic temple and Chassidim don't watch tv or go to movies and it's not because of the content (first and foremost) it's because those pursuits aren't worth the time when you could be studying Torah...

  26. Does anyone remember what month Josh and Anna got engaged? by that we could see what movies would be in the threater at that time to figure it out