This one is for you "mythoughtis" :)
I've been thinking a lot about some things the Duggars say, yet their actions don't quite match up with those said beliefs. We all have those moments, no one's perfectly able to live out their religion in complete and total perfection, if we were, well, I think life on earth wouldn't quite be what it is today. However, since the Duggars have chosen to put their faith as a main part of their TV show, it's fair game to point out things that don't mesh.
1) The Meeting of Dolly Parton - I have no problem that they met Dolly Parton. My problem is how they met Dolly Parton. Jim Bob has gone to great pains to urge us to remove all "worldly" music and TV from our homes that can influence our children. Dolly Parton has been a professional singer for decades. She was a chart topper when both Jim Bob and Michelle were growing up and still watching TV and listening to the radio. In their interviews they claimed not to have known who she was. That right there bothered me. Fine, so they didn't know who she was (ok they are from the south and don't know who she is??) and they are taking their family to go meet her? They indicate that they are somewhat aware that she's a TV/singer personality of some type. Here is the problem....shouldn't they, as concerned parents done some research before exposing their young children to a TV personality? And after such research, is she really a personality that they would have approved of? Yes Dolly has done some gospel singing, but does her entire body of work speak of what the Duggar family stands for?
2) The Girls' Beds - I've mentioned this before in another thread, but this particular point got lost within the main point of the other thread, so I'm going to be more specific here. When they built the house they live in, they had five girls. As they finished the house they had a sixth girl. As they decorated the girl's room, they decorated with five designer matching beds. When the room is panned across during episodes of the show, there doesn't seem to be any room left for adding more beds, at least not more beds that match. The only reason I say this is because these beds all have each girl's name lovingly written across it. Why does this seem like such an issue? Every time someone asks (and they ask and ask and ask) why do you name your kids with "J" names? The answer is 'because we never knew how many we'd have and we didn't want anyone to be left out.' Well granted they didn't know they'd be having three more girls (after the sixth) making a total of nine, but for a family who repeatedly tells the world that they don't like their kids to feel left out, these younger girls are going to be left out of their own room. Their older siblings have matching beds and they don't seem to. Obviously there is going to need to be some rearranging of furniture, some possible use of bunk beds (perhaps the single versions of these actually convert to bunk beds, who knows?) but clearly, not every Duggar daughter will be treated equally.
3) The Gun Picture - This has nothing to do with the actual gun, the owning of guns, the shooting of guns or the possession of guns. I don't care one way or another as I previously wrote about. The point I'm making here is this: What it does have to do is the loving and friendly personas they try to uphold? Again, it's not the guns themselves, it's the pose John-David is making. There is nothing "Duggar-like" about that pose. If he'd just been casually standing there next to a couple of guns, no big deal, but the pose is so...well...non-Duggar, I just don't get it.
So those are the few that come to mind as I write this. As I've been examining those in myself, I have to say, I think it may have to do with who we are as we grow and try to change--try to become "better" people, yet is it really possible to change our innate being. In all truth Jim Bob is a salesman, therefore the Dolly thing was all about salesmanship. Do I have answers for all three? No I do not.
As for the dichotomy that Mythoughtis pointed out in me, well I did try to answer it. Yes I do dress modestly and cover my head. However, I must correct you, I do not cover my head for modesty, I cover my head as a reminder of my faith--that there is someone above me--much in the way that Jewish men wear kippot (yarmulkes.) I am not Chassidic. Chassidic women do cover their hair for modest reasons. And as I admitted, lately I have been more lax on the head coverings, I've been using different coverings, not covering completely--using bandannas so the ponytail sticks out, using hipster beanies etc. Why? I don't have a concrete answer for you, but perhaps I cannot change who I am, while I am living the best orthodox life I can, perhaps deep down I'm reform. While I know that's not exactly true, because I am more conservative than that, I do question myself--someday perhaps I will find an answer--or maybe it's because i can't change who I am deep down, lazy.
You also mentioned my offhand comment about an actor young enough to be my son. Well, he's of legal age. Before my husband I was dating men in their early 20s. Why am I telling you this? To justify my comment? No, not at all. To brag? Probably a little. Actually it's because deep down you can't change who you are...I am who I am and I tend to live my life as an open book.
So Mythoughtis, I hope this finds you well. I would welcome getting to know you better as I have a feeling you have the wrong idea of just who I am. Please feel free to email me ...any of you firstname.lastname@example.org